One important thing that I learn this morning…

When there is even 8 a.m. prac

1. that say “Histology & histopath: GIT structure, epithelium, specialised structures, muscles and sphincters, colonic polyps and cancers”..
2. and u will have no idea what the cell look like by the end of the prac.. it just look like coloured little thing on the slide
3. and u still trying to figure out what words that really gone out through Nigel mouth coz he tend to use a language from the other side of the world
4. and last but not least, though by looking at the microscope , you will hurt you eye and left you nauseated..

my advice is to myself…. “YOU SHOULD GO”….

Is it much better to go to the practical despite all the small non-sense/childish reason I just wrote when u just heard that someone already decide what u gonna eat for the next one week..

I’m in bed, pretending to be sleeping or I think they know that I’m already awake coz I’m just lazying awake… but, I think that really doesn’t matter to them if I heard it or not….

Somehow, I just felt like crying straightaway and wish that I was back at home with my mom and my sister, though they been nagging at me about my cooking skills, they still consider about my eating need and other 7 person that live in that small house…

I cant help if I’m not a vegetarian (not even close), I cant help if I’m such a meaty (eat meat mostly in ever meal) person.. the thought of one week without a meat supply is just sound to dreadful to me. The thing is, it is not that we don’t have money… we have, but, juts a little, enough 1 week supply of food.. but, they decided to wait until next week (when the money has been shipped in to our account) and go buy anything that they can/want eat in bulk…

I know that I don’t have a car… I don’t go to the market anymore… I don’t buy the house food supply anymore.. but, don’t punish me for all of that… if that the case, I would go to clayton every week, just to buy the food or pay $100 if the money is not enough…

I need to eat proper food… what’s the point of living in a house if u cant have the food that really suit you… I have no quarrel to cook everyday coz I know that I need to feed myself.. but, I just feel disappointed coz no one ever care or notice that I need to have a decent food… I know that I didn’t eat breakfast or even have a very light lunch.. coz that’s was my way of living since I was little.. dinner is so important t me and that;s why I eat so much during the night.. It’s not my problem that if I eat 10x more than a normal people, I don’t even put a single kg of weight.. I;m not in the category of people who are concern about putting weight even by having dinner… I’m on the other side of the world.. one week without a proper eating habit (in my definition), believe, I can loose 1 or 2 kg if I don’t take care of myself..

I don’t see the point of trying to stuff myself with vegetable though all the people I meet in my life would say that vegetable is very healthy if it gonna upset my stomach and made me loose my appetite.. “kenyang perut suka hati” .. that one of Malay proverb that somehow I agree… coz I;m not happy right now, I’ve been bragging to the two girls about the fact that some of my housemte been cooking nasi goreng, bihun goreng (no meat) and soup with only potato in it.. and even, not cook at all when there’s no people at house in the evening.. when I say evening.. it’s not night.. it’s evening.. they expect me to spend $10 for dinner while I can have free and decent food at home.. or probably starve at night like some of them were doing right now coz she’s very much in concern about her body image..

Hmm… probably, it’s a right decision for me to stay in Halls next year.. and cook only for myself..

Mom.. I wanna go home… it’s sad enough just to hear your voice through the phone.. though I never said to you that I miss home and you, hannan, tikah, akmal, hadi, abah and even dikya (if u believe me!).. and now, me, still feeling very2 homesick after 2 years here…

Something neve change

The truth is rarely pure and never simple

Oscar Wilde,
The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895, Act I

♥ ♥ ♥ aJLa I'm no angel.. and i manage to remain alive in my own quirky way

"Look at the stars, and not the reflection of the moon."

*having my wickest dream come true *hint* dvz *hint*
*not to kill anyone as a doctor
*a person who can swept me off my feet